Friday, January 23, 2009

Hi Blog, remember me?

Dear Bloggie Blog (you know I like to call you that),

I'm really sorry that I've been distant lately. I know I promised to write to you after a little break, but that little break turned into a bigger break, and I have just felt so overwhelmed with all the thoughts and feelings, the stories, the joys and the heartbreaks of the last three weeks that I just didn't know where to start. So here goes, I'm jumping back in. I hope you can forgive me.

I did not plan to wake up today and find out we were already into the third week of January. How did that happen? Oh right. I was sick. And then, I was fatigued. And then, I became exhausted. And then, I ceased to have muscle function. I also ceased to have female type events (sorry guys, forgot to warn you first... too late now) because of all the aforementioned stuff. THAT is how I know I'm not dealing with things very well. So the last couple days have knocked me off my feet once again, and I'm done. DONE I tell ya!

Ok, we all know that isn't for real. Here's the paragraph where I start to tell the truth. The truth is: I am tired! I want to sleep, but my brain is on an opposite schedule from my body. It's awake at night, and asleep during the day. It's like having a newborn stuffed inside my skull. Maybe if I rock my head back and forth, just so, it will nod off? How about a car ride? Oh, nevermind, I tried that once, and it worked (unfortunately for the car I was driving, and the long tow-truck ride afterwards.) Couldn't I just shove a bottle in my ear and see if anything latches on?

Alright, what's really going on is that God has put me on a treadmill. Not a REAL one, heck no! But I'm huffing and puffing (just like in real life!) and I'm at a 5 percent incline. What's with the incline? Isn't the speed too high? C'mon God, give me something I can work with reasonably here! Yes, I whined. Yes, I darned near passed out. I even had a few dizzy spells, but God told me somethin'. He didn't come out and YELL it or anything, but somewhere, somehow, he reminded me that He can get me through anything.

You want to know how He told me? It's kind of cool actually... I was uploading ALL of my Word Filled Wednesday graphics to an album online. This meant, that I actually had to LOOK at them as I was selecting them. Then, this verses just FLEW off the screen at me, and I'm still chewing on it. It tastes interesting.

James 1:2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Hello? Did anyone else hear that? Yeah... I thought so. He was talking to ME! Click here to see the post I'm talking about since I can't put the dadgum picture up for some reason.

So, Bloggie Blog, I'm here to tell you that I'm "considering" this joy thing a lot more, and trying to work it into my days, (and my nights too, apparently) and I'll be coming around more to fill you in on STUFF. I'll try to make it nice, fun stuff, like back in the old days when we made people wet their pants and all.

Get out the chucks, cover your chairs, and let's have some bloggie fun!

But first... I'm going to get some sleep. Hang on for just a bit longer.

Yours truly,


Jen said...

Just wanted to say that I have the same problem with sleep. I like the newborn stuffed in the skull analogy. A bit horrific of an image, but that pretty much describes it well. I notice it happening even more around my PMS time. I think it is the lack of Serotonin in the brain that messes with sleep habits. Hope you get it all worked out soon. :)

Dana-from chaos to Grace said...

UGH....I'm SO there...I think I've reached my limit on human contact. I want to crawl into a hole and be alone for a while. Maybe I can sleep then... ;)

Beth E. said...

I've really missed your posts and your comments on my blog! Good to hear from you, girlfriend. I've had some recent physical problems, too, and have had to greatly reduce blogging time...much to my dismay!

Praying for you. I have dealt with sleeping issues before. It's NO FUN at all!

Speaking from the Heart said...

I miss you. Please try to get some R&R. I have learned that when I push myself over the edge, I get stressed out and I become ill. I will keep you in my prayers.

In HIS hands,

Katie said...

As a non-sleeper, I can empathize.

HAY! (LOL) I don't have any chucks but I'll be ready with a fresh pair of pants...

Miss ya loads!

Misty said...

oh dear... I did not know God had us at the same "gym" with the same broken treadmills... *sigh*

so, joy that you choose? Just like that? It's just that simple? (ok, so I confess- this is one of those God lessons I learn over and over and over (and over)... my life is like the movie Groundhog Day!)

He And Me + 3 said...

Great glad you are sortof back...get some rest and we will see you very soon!

startastical said...

I am so sorry you cannot sleep. I think there may be a "specialty store" that can hook you up with a sleepy time fix. Not that I would know anything about that at all. You have been through a lot the last few weeks. Rest . .Recover. .Restore my wonderful friend.

heidi said...

Love that verse. It's pulled me up and over many hills in my life. I'll be here when ya get back, Alexis.